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Thursday, October 15, 2020

Ricky Tollikko and the Woke Onez Rebellion Try Turning the Dial to 11

Before getting into the meat of the article, we would like to offer this as a preamble:


"This Is Spinal Tap" might be, at least in this writer's opinion, the greatest mockumentary in the history of the genre (though "Best in Show" and "A Mighty Wind" could both also make a strong case as well). For those who aren't familiar with the film, first shame on you! Second, in summary it is a satirical look at a fictional British metal band and ridicules the pretentiousness of the rock stars of the era.

Now, if there were to be a mockumentary produced on the far-right hateriot movement, the writers would probably dig deep into the perceived character of individuals who are attracted to such groups. The members of this fictional club would be written as ignorant rubes who were credulous of every possible conspiracy theory no matter how ridiculous. They would be seen to walk around aimlessly yelling at random confused and mildly annoyed individuals accusing them of being "antifa" and pestering small businesses who they decided, as a result of getting kicked out for poor behaviour, as "antifa" businesses. And they would have a god awful logo, nonsensical patches, and a name for the club that is so embarrassing one would truly believe that it was named as a result of losing a bet.

Well in Alberta such a hate group exists and sadly it isn't at all satirical:


The Woke Onez (the "z" means they are edgy and TOTALLY listen to Limp Bizkit unironically!) Rebellion is... a thing. Now it isn't much of a thing as there are only four members, but it is a thing nonetheless. The leader and founder is one Ricky Tollikko who also goes by the name Ricky Rush and Wokeonez Rebellion on Facebook because of course he does. Ricky is yet anther club jumper. He has been over the past year or two a member of the Soldiers of Odin, Northern Guard, Canadian Crusaders, Urban Infidels, and now Woke Onez. 

If he joins one more hateriot group before the end of the year he gets a free six inch sandwich at Subway.

Really, the only thing that would make the Paw Patrol Woke Onez even more of a parody of itself would be for the members to get tattoos of their poorly hand-drawn logo but even Ricky wouldn't humiliate himself like that:


Uhm... well, we guess we stand corrected.

Now the WOR have been attending a number of counter-protests of anti-racism events held in Alberta lately including those in Red Deer; the one that was cancelled as a result of far-right agitators and the other that occurred despite the efforts of the far-right among others:


In fact members of the WOR have a particular distain for the BLM movement which they can't really seem to articulate other than with hand gestures and I have to presume monosyllabic grunts:


We think that the ARC founder and former lead writer probably summed this up the best:
We would note here that Ricky had also uploaded a video of himself spitting on the crosswalk, but took it down before we were able to download it. In fact at one point Ricky decided that it might be best to minimize what he posted online lest people like us get a hold of it for our own nefarious purposes:


This commitment lasted about 10 minutes.

Now the WOR have a lot of interests, dissemination of groundless conspiracy theories and false information being amongst their most prolific social media posts:

Yes, ISIS apparently places ads in the Free Calgary page. 
We're guessing that they are trying to off-load an old sofa.

This is a photo Oskar Groening of and not George
Soros
who was 15 when World War II ended.


This one, playing on tropes going back to the 1990s, is my personal favourite:


Note that he claims expertise in what constitutes prison bars because he was in jail and thus knows what they look like.

Really, the jokes write themselves at this point.

Not surprisingly, Ricky's current ire is directed at COVID-19 precautions:


We presume he means "illegal" when he writes "ailligal" but who knows?

Now the problem is that Ricky isn't confining his anti-mask conspiracy woo to social media. No, he's also taking it offline such as this video in a clinic where he is wearing a mask despite his belief that doing so is tyranny which suggests he knows what tyranny means as well as he spells:


He later posts the documents he receives; upon reading them we're not sure they are the smoking gun he appears to believe them to be:


Now we can sit back and laugh at him and his island of misfit toys, and believe us when we say we do. Often. But Ricky and his partner are becoming pests:


Earlier this month a school principal was recorded uttering a racial epithet. The students who recorded the incident were punished but the administrator was not. As a result of this incident and a second, students in the Calgary Catholic School Division staged a walkout to protest racism and to demand that more be done to prevent future incidents. As one can see from the screen shot above posted by his partner, Ricky would have been aware of this incident. 

He didn't appear to be concerned.

When RAAR posted a note on Facebook that they planned on holding a protest outside the Calgary Catholic School offices demanding more be done to address racism, that did upset Ricky:


So, uttering a racial slur? Meh.

Protesting the use of a racial slur and demanding action? THIS IS WAR AND BLM ARE TERRORISTS!!!

Seems reasonable.

Then there's this:


This post is one of a long line of claims made by the far-right. They claim that "antifa" claim they want to meet them but when the hateriots show up the "antifa" member is so frightened he scurries off. It is is almost always made up but is part of the trope in which "antifa" are made to be both a menace to society as well as effeminate cowards.

In any case, the timeline of what takes place is especially interesting.


Ricky and his partner walk to the Palomino Smokehouse ostensibly to meet with the cowardly/dangerous "antifa" member because there's no place better for a rumble than a trendy restaurant that serves slow smoked meats. 

Not surprisingly the "antifa" member (who TOTALLY exists) hightailed out when confronted by Ricky "Five Feet of Fury" Tollikko. The couple then decide to stay for coffee and, noting that they like the joint, make future plans to hold WOR events there:


Spoiler alert (and you should read this in the voice of Morgan Freeman): there will be no WOR events at the Palomino Smokehouse:


Now, given how he behaves in general and the calm demeanor of the employee I have to assume Ricky and his partner were the ones at fault. In fact I think that is usually a safe guess. He is especially incensed at being called a Nazi. To be fair, it might not be entirely accurate to call him a Nazi.

The racist leader of a small hate group who has anger management issues? That works though.

And as evidence, let us offer the following as just some of the proof for that assertion:

Where Do Anti-Semitic Conspiracy Theories About the Rothschild Family Come From?

Explaining the Hundred Handers: the group behind alt-right stickers from Scotland to Sheffield

The problem with "It's Okay to be White".


Race mixing, eh?

Not especially subtle.

But of course it is the people calling out the WOR who are the real racists because reasons:


Ricky and his partner were so proud of the video they took that they took a video of the video to place it on Facebook which is sort of like Inception only really boring:



How dumb indeed.

And traveling down the well-trodden path pioneered by the likes of human dumpster fire Ryan Dean and others, Ricky believes that he and his partner were kicked out because the Palomino Smokehouse is run by "antifa" communists which further indicates that Ricky wouldn't know a communist if one sat on his face and started to wiggle:


Now as a result of Ricky's "you're not the boss of me!" temper tantrum, the following ended up on YouTube:

Sheared? Is there a sheep in the house?

Now based on the spelling, it would appear that Ricky had a hand in publishing this video here:


That said, if Ricky thought he was going to get a lot of support, well... he may have miscalculated a bit:









Incidentally, after he was kicked out of the Palomino Ricky found his "antifa" member, though the reaction of the man strongly suggests he was some random guy wearing a mask because, you know, pandemic, who is just simply confused by the encounter:


Oh Ricky.

You keep on shinning you crazy diamond!


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