Southern Ontario Skins: A Cast of Stooges Part X

While the lead writer of the ARC Collective is planning on taking a hiatus for a month or so to recharge the batteries on a beach somewhere in Baja soon, it wouldn't seem right to leave when there are still a couple to loose ends to tie up.

Then again, we don't expect this particular loose end to remain tied for very long.

Our readers have been following a series that we lovingly refer to as the "cast of stooges" where we provide a running account of some of the misadventures of the Southern Ontario "Skinheads." One of those stooges, Jeremy Crawford, can't seem to help continuing to make a clown out of himself and a fool out of the rest of the SOS, particularly Max "Come at me bro!" Hynes who founded the gang.

In one rather epic and very well read piece on the blog, we posted the email exchanges between ourselves and Crawford who inexplicably believed that we were the SOS or, at the very least, would be willing to help him get in touch with Hynes and then member Brodie Walsh (who later had his own problems one can read here, here, and here). Eventually Crawford figured things out, but not before we were able to string him along for more than a month. Suffice it to say he was a little bit upset.

Now to get an understanding of why Crawford took so long to figure out who we really were, here is a recent example of Crawford thinking:

First, one would think that a prerequisite of running a prison gang like the Aryan Brotherhood would be the ability to spell Aryan. Second, we appreciate his simple logic, if one could refer to this line of thinking as logic: "Black are all criminals who sell drugs. You can trust me because I'm a former federal inmate jailed for selling drugs and possessing illegal weapons."

That being said, we didn't think we would hear from Crawford directly anymore. He's dumb as a brick, but even he knows when to quit, right?

Right?

ALL U GUYS GOT IS YOUR MOUTHS YOUR TELEPHONE TOUGH GUYS IF YOU WERE TO RUN INTO ONE OF US YOU'D BE BACK PEDDLING AND DOING ANYTHING TO SAVE YOUR OWN ASS.

Oh Jeremy Crawford. You are just a national treasure!


Yes, Crawford posted not one but two rambling messages to the blog on September 3 (in addition to the occasional email message we still receive from his virus-infected email account). And both messages are, in a word, glorious:

There is SO much we could do with this message. However, we figure that this might suffice as a response for now:

The second message was posted 23 minutes after the first:

Stop making fun of the SOS? When you, Jeremy, continue to be a goldmine of mirth and amusement for us and for our readers? 

Come on! Even you aren't dumb enough to believe that is going to happen!